Fancy Restaurant
Monday, July 02, 2007
Current mood: sugary
Category: sugary Blogging
I wanna go to a fancy restaurant. I wanna go there but i don’t wanna eat. I’ll probably have to dress up nice to get in but that’s ok. I like getting dressed up sometimes.
I wanna have a really snotty waiter. Preferably a snotty French waiter. I’ve never had a real snotty French waiter. It seems like one of those things you have to do before you die, have it out with a snotty French waiter.
When Jaques or Gerard or whatever the hell his name is asks me for my order, I’ll order the speghetti and meatballs. If they don’t have speghetti and meatballs, I’ll get the veal. It doesn’t really matter what I get, I’m not gonna eat it.
When my food arrives, I’m just gonna throw it on the ground and start gettin funky on it. I like speghetti and meatballs because it is particularly messy. I could get hella funkdified on a plate o that shit, but it doesn’t really matter. Almost any food can be messy. I’m gonna throw speghetti all over everbody in the restaurant and yell as loud as I can. I don’t know what I’ll be yelling, probably just commercial jingles or something.
People are gonna start getting mad, but I’ll just yell louder and start throwing their food everywhere. Everybody will be mad but they’ll probably enjoy it in hindsight. The waiters, however, will be a different story.
All the snotty French waiters will get out their nunchucks and brass knuckles and begin to advance towards me. Me? I’ll just have my blade. The waiters will try to get me but I’ll do some back flips and they won’t. I expect the kung-fu fight to last about 20 minutes with me being victorious of course. The French waiters will be easy to kill but then I’ll have to fight the Sous Chef and the Head Chef . I expect their kung-fu to be a little better than that of the snotty French waiters. It will be hard fighting the chefs but once I bust out my spin kick they’ll get the message.
Once everybody’s ass is kicked, I’ll pay my tab and head out to the disco for some much needed Boogie-Oogie-Oogie. Sure I’ll be tired from killing everybody in the restaurant, (the kitchen staff anyway, I have no intention of killing the patrons) but I always save a few backflips for disco dancing. Who wants to go on a date with me?
Currently watching :
The Big Knife
Release date: 15 October, 2002