November 06th 2008 Posted in
Blogs Well, it’s November 6th. Two days ago we elected the first black dude to be President of the United States. That’s pretty sweet huh? Not that I’m a huge Obama fan or anything. Granted, he’s probably the best candidate we’ve had in a long time, but he’s still a polititian and everybody knows they are all by nature, evil. Of course, I hope I’m wrong and he magically fixes the country his first month in office and he lactates oil from his nipples and rainbows shoot out of his eyes, but that’s pretty unlikely. Not impossible, but unlikely.
I’m psyched that Obama got elected mostly because he’s black. This has opened a doorway for many more black people to run for public office. With Obama in the White House now, in four years we can elect an even more sweet black dude. That’s right, I’m talking about Method Man. Obama may turn out to be a good president, but dude, get Method Man in the Oval Office and ain’t nobody gonna fuck with America. Pop a cap in yo ass, Iran.
Of course, Red Man will be the VP because they both went to Harvard. Right? Isn’t that what that movie How High was about? That’s where all presidents go to school. I thought that movie was a great documentary.
But it doesn’t stop with the Method and Red Man ticket. We gotta get rid of all those crusty old white Supreme Court Justices too. They’re nine seats right? Well, there’s also nine members of Wu-tang. Problem solved. Of course Method Man can’t be the president and a Supreme Court Justice so Cappadonna will take his place and the late Old Dirty Bastard’s chair will be given to a 40 oz of Old English and a gun. You know, for tie breakers. I’m a firm believer that a quick descision can easily be made when malt liquor and firearms are involved.
Now that Obama is in the White House, the scenario described above is inevitable. Young people got Obama in there and young people listen to gangsta rap. Old white republicans don’t listen to gangsta rap and they don’t get they’re old white dudes elected president anymore either! Booyah!! Take that old white folks!
Now, it’s not going to be easy to fix all of the country’s problems with just Wu-Tang. Unfortunately, America seems to be running out of good Gangsta Rappers. We needed to elect these guys when the dudes from NWA were still around. I would have voted on the Dre/Snoop ticket when the cronic dropped and if other 13 and 14 year olds were allowed to vote, I’m sure thaey would have too. Easy-E would solve the economy problems by selling crack to foreign countries. Ice Cube would be could have been secretary of defense, cuz he was rock hard before he started making kids movies. And what the fuck ever happened to MC Ren? I hope it’s not too late America. Wu-Tang in 2012.
